I still remember that day like it was yesterday – October 7, 2014. I got up from the chair and walked out of the hair salon feeling both confident and nervous not knowing what response to expect. I wore no more than a one centimeter cap, which had just replaced what was once more than fifteen inches of lush, flowing mane. But it had dwindled over the years and it was time to go.
I felt different, I felt new.
I felt the stares of disbelief as I walked by and was greeted by the constant “why?” and “what did you do?”. But my hair story was more than they saw that day.
I fast forward to today. And as I sit playing the past four years in my mind I can’t help but think about that day I cut off all my hair and what that meant to me and the lessons I learnt from it.
It’s just hair. . . And it grows back…
Anyone who knows me will know that I have always loved my hair – long, thick and “beautiful”. I had endured the horror of the scalp pains, back then, because I tried so hard and so desperately to hold on to my long strands because I thought it defined me and made me “beautiful”. It is now in looking back that I realize I am “me” not because of the hair on my head but because of the person I choose to be. My hair does not define me. And the last four years made me realize, with all the stages my hair had to go through to get to where it is now, that it really is just hair and it does grow back.
New Journey, Fresh Motivation . . .
Back when I cut my hair I was clueless about the ongoing “natural hair movement” (strange I know – but I live further under my rock that Patrick Star 😂😂 )
But cutting my hair had made me more open to sharing my story in the hopes of inspiring someone else. And that new motivation helped in starting my blog and my YouTube channel -along with other factors ofcourse. I no longer felt afraid of what people would think or if they would respond positively to what I had to put out there. I was embarking on this new journey to grow into the best version of myself and hoped to inspire others along the way.
Fear of cutting again ??. . . Or Not
I have recently been constantly thinking about doing a second big chop. Not because my hair is unhealthy or because it is dull but just because I felt it would be “cool” …. but really though?!?! I have outgrown the fear of cutting my hair but choose to not cut because then I would be cutting for the wrong reasons. If the day comes and I need to cut then I will do so but for now cutting feels like a trend that is attached to “difficulties” one faces that cause them to cut their hair to start anew. . . And that is not my reality. . So no cut for me.
Nappily Ever After . . .
Now if you have already read my review of the book then you would know my thoughts on the message of the book. It fits in nicely with my first point that I am more than my hair. When we come to accept ourselves we truly understand what is it to love yourself no matter what.
The care still goes on . . .
Now, accepting my hair how it is and not allowing it to define does not mean that I leave it unkempt hahaha. There is still need to take care of your hair becauae, let’s face it, we don’t want to walk around feeling messy. No matter how much our hair does not define us it plays a major role in how we present ourselves especially in a professional setting. So ofcourse I do encourage maintaining a healthy hair routine and keeping to styles that best suits you and your situation. I feel very comfortable wearing an afro to work and don’t feel unprofessional when I do, because my hair is only part of the package that I offer. Some may see it as “loud” or “unprofessional” but I have come to realize that most of the people I deal with and give service to at work are really not bothered – quite contrary to popular belief. They are more concerned with how they are treated and how their experience was with you and my hair more often than not gets high praise even in an afro. So care for your hair but don’t stress too much… just do what works for you!
So as I mark today as four years since my big chop and I am happy that I went through the pain which led to my chop. It has been a journey about more than just growing my hair or making it more healthy. It has also been a journey of growth. Growth as an individual (mental as well as spiritual), growth as a motivator and growth as an influencer. I remain thankful for all I have learnt and continue to learn along my journey and am grateful to all who have shared the journey with me.
Until Next Time Lovies